Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Daddy's Note..

Dear Alexis,
I don't even know where to begin...  I love you more than life itself and miss you everyday.  Your mommy and I tried so hard to get you here and when we found out we were having you and Mackenzie, I wasn't even scared.  I was actually excited that I had been blessed with two girls.  Even as just embryos, I knew I would love you both until the day I died.
When you both were born, I was so scared because of how early you were, however I saw how strong you already were.  Its amazing to me how brave and strong you and your sister were and how weak and helpless I felt..  You continued to grow and get strong and everyone said how well you were doing.
Then my world came crashing down on 08/16/2011 when they told me you needed surgery.  Again I felt helpless and weak, but knew how strong you were.  Unfortunately your body wasn't as strong as your soul and we had to let you go...  I have never felt pain like that and cotinue to everyday since we said goodbye.
There are so many things I wanted to teach you and now I will never get to.  I looked forward to seeing you crawl, say your first words, take your first step.  I looked forward to potty training you, taking you to your first day of school, teaching you how to ride a bicycle, easing your pain from your first heart break, seeing you in your prom dress, graduate from high school, graduate from college, walk you down the isle, give birth to your children, and so many other things that I'm probably not thinking of.  Now these things will never come to pass.
Our time was cut entirely too short and now my heart breaks.  I no longer feel complete without you here, but I know you would want me to stay strong for your sister.  She now fights to grow and get strong and I want you to help her.  She's the older sister, but you were the bigger/ stronger one.  You were so brave throughout everything and now she needs your stregth to survive...  Baby girl, please help her because I can't bear to loose both of you.
Thank you for allowing me the honor of being your daddy, even as short as it was...  I will never forget you and think of your often.  I know you have important work there in Heaven since God called you so soon, but check in on us from time to time.  Love always,

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